The truth is I’m an attention whore. Positive, negative, it makes no difference. I’ll do anything for a laugh, or even better, for that horrified look that normal people get when I say or do ridiculous things that they would never in a million years embarrass themselves with. So you could imagine the extra dose of adrenaline I got when it occurred to me that being a published author with mounting five-star reviews might get me an interview and my picture in a magazine!
Yes! First ECHO, then Ellen…damn! I’m too late for Oprah. Oh well, Rose’s Will might be a little too edgy for her anyway. Maybe 60 Minutes. Yeah, that’s it. They like controversial topics that the Tomorrow’s News From This Morning’s Today Show can’t handle.
In a moment of lucidity, though, I decided that I might need a little more practice before I talked to Leslie Stahl, so I surfed around to a few sites that offered author interviews, “Hey there, do you want me to talk about my new book – yeah, Rose’s Will, the one where I throw a blue-collar family man, a Bulgarian Holocaust survivor and a lesbian atheist together and make them deal with an awful Italian woman from Brooklyn? Oh, you do? Great!”
Thanks you guys! You’re the best! I’m also available for book signings, book club discussions, or your mother’s house (if she makes good lasagne).